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This is the 101 on hurting your own feelings.
For those who don’t know, 101 means “the introduction to”

So essentially this post is saying “An introduction to hurting your own feelings.”

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So I think the process or action that takes the cup and can guarantee a frown, grimace or even tears running down your face is

Drumroll please

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How you perceive a situation. To be specific, a negative mindset or perspective.

Case in point

I’m allergic to a lot of detergents so I wear gloves when I handle them. When I don’t wear gloves when doing my chores its a disaster. My skin breaks out big time; especially my right hand because I’m right handed. Long story short, its not that big of a deal, we move-

Right?

Well to me it was a huge deal, I thought my hand was terrible, scary even. I’d be so self conscious when shaking people’s hands, signing papers while people are watching, writing the names of late comers – people notice. Some stare. Some ask about it.

Others would flee from me. (or tried to, either way, you hate to see it)

So me, the owner of the hand got even more self conscious and anything negative or awkward that happened… I attributed it to my hand. I perceived every shrug, snicker, frown and shudder as a response to my hand.

“..like one who takes
Everything said as personal to himself.” – Robert Frost

One day my friend’s little brother dropped his ruler while packing his stationery and since I was much closer to it, I picked it up, with that hand that has something wrong with it, the right hand.

And he held it with two fingers like the ruler was diseased or something.

I was so hurt. In my mind I started saying a bunch of stuff and started getting all defensive.
He thinks my hand is gross, how dare he do that it’s not even contagious, it’s an allergic reaction, have you no shy, oh you, its not my fault, why? I’m human too, walk a mile in my shoes…

He’s then handed car keys by his aunt. He does the same thing.

 

Wait. What?

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Then I realised he was trying to wash his hands. He’d put handwash on his hands and was waiting to wash it off so he wouldn’t get soap all over the place.

The ruler situation had nothing to do with me and my hand. I made it about me and in doing so I hurt my own feelings.

If you have a negative mindset then somehow you’ll always manipulate the facts and the story will never have a happy ending. Its like wearing a certain lens over your eyes, the reality will always be warped and altered.

Another thing I learned from this was that the things that happen to us can sometimes impact us negatively because they consolidate an idea we already have about ourselves. That was simply someone trying to multi-task; washing their hands and packing their stationery, then there was me, I had the idea that my hand was “terrible, scary even” and the slipper fit when that ruler was picked up in that manner.

To lighten the mood I’ll end with a pun.

This post had to do with my hand.
What do hands do?
Touch
… A touching blog post